New Beginnings and Uneven Boobs!!

HELLOOOOOO out there! I'm back!

Wow. It has been a bunch of craziness since I last blogged it up on here and I have SO much to say in order to catch everyone up. And the weird thing is, now 'everyone' consists of completely different people. I started this blog to allow our family in West Virginia a way to keep in touch with our lives. Now, however, the blog is geared to a completely different demographic! Now I'm going to focus my entries on our friends because we have officially MOVED BACK TO WV! :) I'll have to post a blog soon with pictures, but right now I just want to take a little bit to let you know what we've been into.

We moved back in March, and have loved settling in. It has been so great to catch up with family, but we miss our VA friends (and the beach!) a lot. By coming back we have realized how much we changed while we were away. We gained a lot from our move to Virginia and of these lessons I think the most important ones were (1) Independence, (2) Stronger Faith and (3) Health. We learned to be independent, found an awesome church that got us connected and rooted, and dropped a ton of weight. Now that we're moving back, it's hard to stay thin with the lack of Trader Joe's (and we're trying to teach our family what we learned in hopes that the 'homecooked' meals eventually dwindle out...even though they are tasty! :) We work out 5-6 days per week and are eating mostly veggies now. Hopefully that will help.

So after we moved back, the company Rob worked for had to lay him off. The work just dried up. So if you need any graphic design work, PLEASE let us know! Right now Rob is freelancing and we're trying to make ends meet while he looks for a job. As you guys know, I've been a stay-at-home mom since Ellie was born. Well, I started doing a little volunteer work with WV State University and low and behold, the team of great people I met there really would like to eventually hire me when funding allows. They like me SO much that in July they are paying my way to a symposium in Cleveland. I'm pretty stoked about this. All that to say - I may end up working while Rob freelances from home. This makes sense because while I don't bring in the big bucks like he does, I do get great vacation and excellent benefits. But we have no idea what's happening so we'll have to see. I'll keep ya posted ;)

Ellie is 10 MONTHS OLD. I can't believe it. And she's cuter and cuter every day, if I do say so myself ;) Today is actually a milestone that I'm kind of sad about. As most of you know I am pretty open about things and while I never was one to breastfeed in public, I have no problem whatsoever blogging about it. I always wanted to know how women felt while breastfeeding and I wished people told me more so here goes. I have felt very strongly about breastfeeding Ellie until she turned one. I received a LOT of grief about this from several people, but this is just what Rob and I chose to do and we don't care what people think. We live in one of the few countries that frown on breastfeeding for any length of time and I think it is very sad. I think it's a little creepy to do it when the kid is asking for 'booby', but I won't pass judgment because I believe it is the right of the mother (and the child) to choose when it is time to wean. Yes, children will wean themselves...case in point: Ellie.

Here lately things have changed. I started noticing that my left breast would not produce milk and it eventually dried up. I tried everything from herbal remedies to pumping and nothing worked. Looking in the mirror was hilarious because my chest looked like two different women. Ellie has been nursing on the right breast alone for well over a month now. I have no problem with this because it seems that she has been getting enough to drink and we're just fine. Then BOOM. Right in the middle of all this, Rob's job was eliminated out from under him. We both felt very strongly about one of us being home with Ellie, and we both thought that person would be me so I didn't think about weaning her. Then, we started to shift our prayers for God to change our hearts to match HIS will about the situation. Suddenly I found myself gravitating towards the possibility of working again, and one Sunday (last Sunday) after church I looked at Rob and said 'let's go pick up some organic formula right now'. It was like something just told me to. So since then we have been slowly weaning Ellie, and she has done VERY well. She hasn't shown as much interest in breastfeeding and I truly think it was God's doing. It had to have been.

But this is so hard for me. As I'm sitting here typing this (I am going to sound SO pathetic), I'm sobbing. In addition to all the hormones buzzing around inside of me, I feel like I've lost my baby. This little girl that I carried for 9 months, and then the little baby who was glued to me for 10 more months...dare I say...can survive without me. If something happened to me today, she would be fine. And that is a WONDERFUL, WONDERFUL thing. But taking this step is emotionally, physically and hormonally very difficult.

I have always coached myself, even before my pregnancy, that I would not become a 'Momzilla'. And by 'Momzilla,' I mean someone who is a mother because of the rewards that come with it, and who does not step back and allow their children to live their lives and grow up. My mother was never like that to me, and I want to be like her. :) I want Ellie to be strong and self confident. Sure, I want her to call me when she has questions about things and I will ALWAYS be there for her. But I want Ellie to be a strong, independent woman. Today was the first step in seeing that happen and while I realize that I did my part and that I nourished her as best I could for 19 months and, while this is very sad for me, I am so proud of her.

So I'll wrap it up by telling all of you what I would say to anyone who is interested in breastfeeding their babies or to those wanting to know what it is like:

Breastfeeding is not easy. At the beginning (and when baby gets teeth) it hurts like you could never imagine. You will want someone (anyone!!) to hold your baby because your arm is killing you and feels like it will fall off from toting the child around...and what's worse? She probably won't want to go to them because she is SO COMPLETELY connected to you because of breastfeeding and the bonding that occurred there (not to say formula babies don't connect with their mothers because they most definitely do!!). But let me tell you...it is the most rewarding experience I have ever had and I wish everyone woman could experience it once. I did not quit because it was 'inconvenient'. Trust me...it can be inconvenient (moreso for others around me than myself), but there will be MANY times when I am inconvenienced for her benefit and I will most gladly step up to bat! I was happy and honored to do this for her.

And while I am an advocate for breastfeeding, I am so thankful for formula...especially organic formula. I think it is a wonderful thing and has allowed so many mothers to provide for their families and has allowed fathers to bond with their children. There truly is nothing like feeding a baby. It is so fulfilling.

Anyway - enough about boobs! I hope you check back soon because I have lots of pics to post!!! :D It's so good to be back!

Peace,
J

Ellie is 7 months old!!!!

Okay so I'm a little late posting these, but I can't BELIEVE it's been 7 months. It makes me sad, actually. But Ellie is at SUCH a cute age and I love playing with her. Her personality is amazing, she has an awesome sense of humor, and I love every second we're together. Rob and I LOVE being parents, and I'll have to say we make a great team. We have been so very blessed and hope there are more kids in the future!

Also just a 'thank you' to everyone who has sent me all the sweet comments about Ellie (that's you, Jess!) It's so awesome to get encouraging words and all the compliments! We love you guys! Enjoy ;)

The Simple Things in Life

I can't believe how long it's been since I've posted something!! I've been putting all my time and efforts into keeping my Facebook account updated with pictures of Ellie and just general stuff, so I have sort of neglected the blog.

First, here are a few pics of the Kid since I know you guys are more interested in that! She just turned 7 months old and I can't believe it. I feel like we grow closer every day and we have so much fun - she really is my little side kick :)




So as spring is right around the corner, I love the warmth of the sun when I open the blinds in the house. I just feel like it's been too long since it's been here. This is the first year I've felt like that - normally winter is my favorite season. I'm sure most of it has to do with the fact that I can't take Ellie out in the cold like I used to get out before she was around. So needless to say - I've had a bad case of cabin fever.

But I'm REALLY excited this year. Rob and I are, quite possibly, a few weeks away from moving back to West Virginia. There will be things we will miss here, but SO many things we have learned that we will take back with us. Here are a few of my favorite 'simple things':

- Hot tea in its most raw form can really put life back into me, even after the worst days.
- The independence we have gained from our move to Virginia does not have to be lost. This life is ours.
- Good friends remain good friends no matter how far apart we are.
- We now have a relationship with our food. We do our best to know where it comes from and what it does to us when we eat it.
- We now have a relationship with God. Before we moved here - I can't honestly say that I had that. And because of it - we have been blessed in some truly miraculous ways.
- Some people are going to look at our life and say 'they made a mistake' or 'that was a bad move'. What they don't know is that it was God's path for us and we are greatly blessed because we listened to Him and tuned out the background noise.
- Even in the hardest times, we will always have each other.
- Days are a little brighter when Ellie has two good naps.
- Our home is our sanctuary and keeping it clean is a necessity for me.
- You can take the girl out of the mountains, but you can't take the mountains out of the girl.

:)

Ellie's First Foods!

This may be too much information for some of you, but I am bound and determined to breastfeed for as long as I can, up to 12 months. The American Academy of Pediatrics recommends 12 mos for the baby's health, and overall I think it's really important. Having said that, Ellie turned 6 months this week!!! She is at the age where she can now safely start solids, and we are totally excited to announce that we did that yesterday for the first time on her half-birthday. Her first 'solid' meal was rice cereal in the bottle, which she chugged in about 2 seconds. So I called the pediatrician to double check, and then we moved on. Her next meal was Earth's Best organic apples and some thicker rice cereal. She ate like a champ!!! For all who are interested, we're using Earth's Best or making our own (yes, I know Gerber also has organic, but we're going to try and be consistent)...and we gladly accept coupons! :D Enjoy the pics and have a wicked fun weekend! :D